In the previous blog entry, we looked at anger as a response to bullying. Anger can sometimes be a relatively easy feeling to have, something that hurts us less than other challenging emotions do. In other words, anger can be masking a different emotion. One of the emotions it could be masking is fear. Bullies are scary. Some of them are bigger than you, and, even if they're not, they're still a threat. You know that every time you meet them in the future they will make you feel miserable, and they might even physically hurt you. Some people, especially boys/men might find it hard to admit they're scared. However, like anger, fear is a natural response to a real problem. It's ok to feel that way.

So, why do you feel anger or fear when encountering bullies? Because of a part of your brain called the Amygdala. It acts as your brain's early warning system. Our ancient ancestors faced constant danger from things like wild animals. When this happened, the Amygdala would prepare them for action, so that they could survive. It is still doing this within each of us today. This includes the Amygdala putting adrenaline into your system, making your heart beat faster, increasing your pulse rate, and making you sweat. All of these things prepare your body for dealing with danger. When you're a child you are at your most vulnerable. The Amygdala considers things like being bullied as a threat to your life. Even as you get older, it can still react this way.

The Amygdala gets your body ready to response to danger in 3 different ways, know collectively as sympathetic nervous system activation. These 3 response are flight (i.e. running away), fight or freeze (i.e. remaining as still as possible so you won't be noticed.) Some people think there is a 4^th response called "Fawning", which I might cover in a future blog post. Usually, one person will stick with one response. For example, I usually have freeze as mine. This is like the way in which a deer stops and just stares at the headlights of a car moving towards it, instead of running away. Freeze, which might also include hiding somewhere, might seem like a silly reaction to bullies. The Amygdala is a very old part of our brains, and hasn't evolved to deal with the modern world yet. Of course, which response you have isn't something you consciously choose. The reasons why one person has the flight response, one person has the fight response, and one person has the freeze response are complicated. However, whichever one you have, it will be motivated by fear. In the next blog entry I will give you suggestions for how to deal with fear.